My last post explained the four dimensions of perpetual conflict: Relational, Structural, Personal, and Spiritual. Each dimension contains factors that reveal the causes of conflict.
This post dives into the 7 factors of the Relational Dimension that keep teams mired in chronic tension.
The 7 Relational Dynamics describe scenarios where employee relationships are creating or perpetuating conflict. Consider your own work experiences and observations to see if you can recognize some of these problematic situations.
Relational Dynamic 1: Personality Clash
The most commonly used explanation for failure to resolve conflict is “incompatible personalities.” When leaders speak of personality conflicts, they may be using the term in one of two ways—one is a cover up for a different problem, and one is a real conflict factor.
The first way we use that term is a euphemism for problems we don’t want to mention or define. In such cases, “personality” is a cover for a completely different problem that might be money, performance, expectations, power/control, etc.
The second way we use the phrase “personality conflict” is to describe a person that we either don’t understand or don’t know how to work with. Over the last 20 years of working with leaders, teams, and organizations, I have found it invaluable to provide training on identifying and successfully working with all types of personalities, even the challenging ones.
Relational Dynamic 2: Double Team
When two employees act as a block or a unit. Conflict can come when management wants to deal with one but is forced to consider the other, or when peers have to deal with both employees as a block. Resentment builds as others face continual frustration with this dynamic.
Relational Dynamic 3: Threat
When one employee feels that another employee is blocking his/her upward progress, blocking communication, or threatening his/her job. The conflict is likely to continue as long as the perceived threat is present.
Relational Dynamic 4: Up v. Down
When an employee gives a very positive appearance upward to management but treats peers badly. Managers may be unaware of the bad behavior. This conflict is hard to address because of divergence between reports and direct observations. One department manager said to me, “Other people tell me that she has been a problem, but my personal experience with her has always been very positive.”
Relational Dynamic 5: AmBOSSador
When an employee reports directly to a leader, that employee will always be seen as having the boss on his/her shoulder. It’s easy for the amBOSSador to cross the line and misuse this position. Peers may assume that anything they say or do is shared upward with the boss, which reduces trust and openness.
Relational Dynamic 6: Track Back
When conflict issues in the past were left behind but never resolved. Old issues continue to block current day trust. When one or both parties are unwilling to speak about the past, the conflict cycle will continue indefinitely. In one team I worked with, the manager was holding on to a mistake an employee had made five years ago and refused to trust that person ever again.
Relational Dynamic 7: Family Matters
When employees are related. This dynamic seems to be more common in family businesses and nonprofits, but it can occur in any organization. It’s worse when one family member reports directly to another, setting up a very difficult scenario for resolving conflict.
What next?
When one (or more) of these 7 Relational Dynamics are present, the conflict will not go away until the cause is addressed. Walking on eggshells is not a solution. Nor will it help to move people around in the organization.
Check the blog each week—at the end of this series we will share a downloadable map of all the conflict factors and dynamics.
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